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Come on Peter, Earth needs us they sent an alarm! Let's go!.. wait, what's wrong? What? Your webs aren't working? Are you sure? Go ahead and try to do it. Wow, they really aren't coming out. I can't believe you're shooting blanks at a time like this. Maybe we just need to get your adrenaline up. Why don't you go ahead and feel my tits. You can even feel up my ass, that should get your heart pumping. Okay now try again.. still nothing?
Wow.. I mean, without your webs, what use are you really? Oh you look so sad about it. I would be too if I were you. How pathetic is it that you can't even shoot your webs anymore, I guess you're just truly useless to us now. I guess this is the one multiverse where you're nothing more than a pathetic little man with no special powers. And now that I see how powerless you are, I'm going to make sure you know it while you sit there and cry your little spider tears.
Looks like I'm the only one who's going to be saving the day.